I just got home from a quick business trip to Memphis. I go every year, and I can honestly say that it feels more like a vacation then work – mainly because I LOVE Memphis, and the people there are the nicest group of people ever. Even the panhandlers are nice. And it’s incredibly cheap. And they cook everything in chicken grease. And I love grits. And this year, I met the LA Clippers (don’t know them from a hole in the wall, but they’re all like 8 feet tall so it was easy to see who was a basketball player and who wasn’t).
That’s all besides the point. Where I really am a menace is in the airport.
I am one of the most relaxed travelers you’ll ever meet. Literally. I mosey around, I don’t rush, I’m always at the airport with plenty of time to spare and I like to drink some cocoa before getting on the plane for an in-air nap. Planes make me sleepy, and its the best sleep I’ve ever had, each time.
I’m also relatively unassuming – blonde haired/green-eyed chic. Wearing yoga pants.
Every single time I go through the Memphis airport (now, mind you, this is a SMALL airport, and not terribly busy) I get randomly selected for additional screening. One year, they went through my bag (which is funny, because I accidentally packed a bottle of hot sauce into a shoe and they had to toss it – bummy), the next year, I had to go through the blowey-scanny thing, and this most recent time they wiped my hands looking for explosives, patted me down AND made me get X Ray Scanned. The guy looks at me and says “I feel like I’ve met you before…”
Buddy, I’m not famous yet, you guys just ping me every year. Its okay though, I like the attention.